Thirty By 30

A while ago I made a rough draft of a Thirty Things To Do Before I Turn 30.  In the wake of my quarter-life crisis, I felt it necessary to lay out a little plan for myself.  Now my list may not look like much, but these ambitions are my goals, and mine alone.  Who knows if they will all be accomplished, and ya know what?

Who cares?

It was enlightening to sit down and really consider what I wanted to do with the life I live.  To see a bigger picture of who I can become.

It helps me to share these sorts of ambitions for some reason, too.  I think it has something to do with the fact that someone has the opportunity to doubt me.  To question my desires.  To tell me I'm not good enough.

I think everyone yearns for judgement in a way.  It's the shadow of insecurity.  That pull, like your peers have your gut in their grasp; that's the yearning.  Yes, you beg for it to be good, but that self-torturing thought bouncing through your brain, it makes you tremble.  With every passing thought, it reminds you of just how much you want to be liked.

So, here's my Thirty by 30.  Begging for your approval.  Ready to rival any negative opinion, but willing to take the judgement.  It's time to let that grasp on my gut pull me towards my dreams.

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